Allow Me To Be Low

Pen is strange. It spurts out words that are our inner reflection. If we allow it to go on until it tires, we get a clear image of our mind mapped out for that moment. Mood swings, depression, highs or lows are modes on which we opearte at different times.

Today I just set my pen free. Let it write on and carry my soul with it. Dark grey is the the colour it chose from the palette. Storm brewing as clouds gather to give it size and momentum. The core looks calm in a dark shade of blue with hurt. Still waters run deep. The hurt looks to have depth. Clouds in a protective gesture, huddle around it. Fuming at times with fury becoming almost black and then again settling to dark grey.

The pen stops.

Time I took over and wrote with it. A dark blue palcid spot surrounded by dark grey masses. Try painting it. That’s me now.

Not a new state but the difference is that I am looking at it without feeling guilty. The placid blue spot is my soul and I accept ownership of it. Not always it got to be a vibrant red for me to bare it. Blue is also okay. It is just an honest reflection.

Acceptance is recognition much needed for the healing to start.

I wait for the next map to emerge, a red spot with green wings until then it is blue.